I was loading some new videos into our 'On Demand' collection and it got me thinking. Demand sounds, to me, verging on aggressive! For example, I demand that you give me a refund for these faulty goods or I demand that you answer me and so forth....
So that led me to substituting some other words for demand. Here are some of them I considered and some from the thesaurus:- command, ask, stipulate, order, dictate, desire, require ..... and the most obvious REQUEST. Of course some of these words do not fit the situation, for me request is the closest. Yet it is not the ideal message. On request sounds slow, it sounds like you're starting up a process and someone at the other end has to action it for you, whereas ON DEMAND impresses that the power is with you to draw down a video to watch at any time, no waiting, no one else involved just click and collect so to speak. So at the end of the day On Demand is the right choice in this case as it has become a recognised phrase. But if you are in an enviroment where you are subjected to aggressive language at home or in the workplace then your inner peace is being contaminated.
Then I started thinking about the way we use words (again sorry if I'm boring you, it's just a thing I have). These days the politeness seems to be giving way for personal power and control. We're all busy empowering and positioning ourselves that we have lost some compassion along the way. We all seem to be staking our position whether outright and up front or under cover and fake. We want everything instantly, when we say and we don't really want to wait around for someone else to do their thing. I suppose this is one of the side effets from the benefits we get from technological advances where we are more and more self-sufficient with our laptops and mobile phones. Where in the past we had to be patient whilst waiting for a specialist to process something for us, duplicate, sub contract etc., now we get annoyed with technology if it is making us wait for a few extra minutes as it's running slow and by that I don't mean extending the wait to days or weeks. It's always fairly instant.
And with all the extra knowledge we need to fit into the modern work stream then we can sometimes get overloaded. We don't always have the time to word things politely, we may start to be more abrupt as nothing except what is inside our heads is important to us. You could find it referred to as stress which comes with bad temper. We don't have time to consider others and the effect our words may be having on them.
As a hypnotherapist working with words all the time I can tell you that the words you choose to use do have an impact, create an initial impression. Self talk most definitely included.
Considering the way you word things is very important if you want to offer a caring attitude to others and this is especially relevant with your children and with teenagers going through confusing changes. Changes that you have to adjust to as well. But beware if you're not genuine the fakeness shows.
And talking of instant gratification, I suppose we should be grateful but something has to give and one of the things that seems to be giving is cooking your own food. It is now normal to grab a quick meal so normal that it has a name 'fast food'. What we put into ourselves is one of the most important things we can consider that includes food, drink and words via thoughts.
Life is too fast to worry about that though we just rush on.
COVID has slowed us down and many people are looking at simplifying their lives and slowing down to appreciate the pace of life. Yipee is all I can say. Good on yer!
Just in case you're wondering our on demand classes are accessed through membership see more on the website. We have a range of activities on and off line to introduce some calm and space into your week. Take a look at the website and whats on for more info.
Stay calm and carry on but watch your words.
Andrea Lowe Hypnotherapist and trainer at Mind and Body