End of course celebration
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» Listings for October 2013
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When positive is not so good!
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You've probably heard that negative ions are good for you and positive ones are to be avoided but do you know what it means, what positive ions are and where you find them?
Maybe this will help a little.Do you feel the bracing impact of being close to a rough sea? The refreshing aftermath of a thunderstorm? That is the effect of negative ions. The air feels light and fresh.
You may also have experienced the heavy murky feeling before a thunderstorm. You could have felt a heavy head experience. That's the build up of positive ions reaching their peak. The storm produces electricity (lightening) and clears the atmosphere filling it full of calm peaceful clarity. The Ions are attracted together and form a heavy cluster.
Natural conditions produce positive ions and then have a way of neutralising them and producing healthy refreshing negative ions.
However in our homes we have an abundance of positive ion producing equipment that is not naturally neutralised. TV's, phones, computers ... all bombard you with a frequency that is much more than our body and brain is used to creating what is termed electrical smog.
This can cause problems like lack of sleep, nervousness,body stress, lack of concentration, sluggishness.
We are about to be spending more time in our homes as the winter months set in. We will be more likely to be using electrical equipment and introducing more positive ions into our atmosphere. It's important to prepare our home and make it as comfortable as possible
It's important to introduce ways to neutralise these positive ions in as many ways as you can.
Here are some suggestions:
- Have a few plants - they help to clear the air.
- Ventilate with fresh moving air
- Use natural cleaning products
- vaccuum and clean regularly to keep the dust down.
- Don't smoke in the house
Water
Just as the movement of the ocean produces negative ions, then water movement in your home will, to a lesser extend do the same. So a water feature is not only relaxing but also refreshing and purifying.Salt Crystals
In the form of lamps or tea light holders, salt crystals when warmed attract moisture which in turn attracts positive ions. Negative ions from the salt neutralises the ions and cleanses the atmosphere. Salt caves have been used for many years as a place of recupperation and rejuvenation, just by sitting in the warm damp caves and relaxing. You can also buy small crystals of salt to either heat in a dish over a tea light or you can place a tea light in the middle of them on a saucer. -
Relating to a People Pleaser
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Yes, yes, yes
Do you know someone who is a people pleaser? You know the type, you can depend on them agreeing to do anything for you and it's a bit of a shock if they say no!Maybe you recognise this in yourself and find it difficult to refuse a request from someone.
Generally in the long run pps get disrespected, undervalued and overlooked.
But this blog is about being in a realtionship with a pp.
The relationship could be a professional one or a personal one.
The up side, you would think, of this is that the pp would do everything they could to please you - so you can be sure they are dependable...... well not exactly, you see the pp relationship is not exclusive,,, so they are trying to keep lots of people happy - not just you. It's not really possible so it's therefore safe to say that being in a relationship with a pp means that you cannot rely on them. The fact that their intentions were good means that they do not like it when you criticise them, after all they have every good intention towards you but they just couldn't give any more. It seems to them unfair that you cannot understand this.
Ask anyone who works with or lives with a pp and you will find that frustration will crop up in their reply.
Pps think they are loyal and need to be seen as loyal and good friends but they cannot be faithful or true to you in the broadest sense. They are a sucker for someone in trouble or someone they can impress.
It's bad enough in a professional relationship but if your partner, spouse or other is a pp then as you are probably the most certain most reliable person in their lives and they don't need to work too hard to please you, so you will be the bottom of the pile when it comes to helping people out. You will get frustrated regularly asthey continue to let you down through helping someone else out. It's hard though too be too angry as that makes you seem chrlish because after all they are letting you down whilst serving others - not going on a bender!
In most cases the best relationship to have with a pp is a casual friendship as you are not to be taken for granted but still impressable.
My clients often suffer from partners who are people pleasers and it's often partners of pps who need the Assertiveness Training.. here are some examples:
A friend who needed to impress men and would drop any arrangements with her girlfriend at a moments notice if she got a better offer from a man. She would also ignore her friend socially if a suitable man joined the conversation.
A wife who found her husband, a pp, was going to the extreme of giving away their childrens toys to impress casual friends.
Generally pps are really good at talking the talk but a little incapacitated when it comes to sustaining the walk long term.
People Pleasers have a real psychological problem. You might think that they would benefit from assertiveness training but many of them can be assertive.
Anyone who felt they needed an assertiveness course can also tell you that knowing how to do something can help a little but if it doesn't feel right then you still have a problem. Each time you practise the activities you have learned you have to stretch your comfort zone that much more. Over time it will embed but not if there is an emotion attached to your need to pp.
Getting to the reason why pps need to get the affirmations from others and they cannot respect themselves is an interesting therapeutic journey with a very liberating ending.
This is just one of the reasons why being a hypnotherapist is so satisfying.